26

While in Alaska, I turned 26.

I consider Birthday to be personal New Year’s. I don’t really buy the whole New Years Resolution crap, so I like to set goals for myself each birthday. Last year I learned how to play the guitar (to some degree).

I’m not sure why, but 26 feels old. It’s not old. Not even close. But to acknowledge that as my age feels odd, because I still feel so… small. I suppose there is not much to tie me to the adult world. I’m increasingly non-committal, and the only thing I actually own is a 12 year old car. I have terrible credit, and I’ve been single for years. Maybe these things keep me feeling young. 

Anyway, here is my list:

1. Read more. I love to read. I love bookstores. I used to say, when I was a child, that if I could live in a Barnes and Noble I would. I’ve actually made good so far on this goal. In the last two weeks I have read “Delirium” by Lauren Oliver (I love YA fiction. Sue me.), and “Warm Bodies by Isaac Marion. I’m halfway through “Is Everyone Hanging out Without Me?” by Mindy Kaling, and I’m about to start “The Magicians” by Lev Grossman. Not bad for two weeks.

2. Learn to Knit.

3. Keep at the Guitar. I love playing, but when I spend weeks, sometimes months, away from home, my progress is slow.

4. Be more positive. Sure, life blows. But it’s also amazing and wonderful at the same time. These last three years I’ve really been run through the ringer. I want to be hopeful again. This is my year, I think.

5. Finally run a marathon. I’m up to 4 miles. I just have to keep progressing, and remember to give myself recovery time. I can do this.

So, I feel like all of those things will widen my world a little. Notice “get a boyfriend” is absent. I’d love one, but if I could just say I’m going to “get a boyfriend”, I would have done it already. Jeez.